i love cereal and hate spiders

Text I think it’s fair to say that the only thing more terrifying to a politician than the other party having power is the people having power.

Time for a 3rd party, everyone.

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To the gobs of chicks calling themselves ‘awkward’:

a) If you don’t have a hard time getting laid, you’re not really that awkward.

b) Everyone is calling themselves awkward now, so really you’re just normal.

c) By now it’s common knowledge when you call yourself ‘awkward’, it’s really your codeword for calling yourself ‘cute’, so

d) Find a new word, please.

Link Can't Make It to an Event?

I was supposed to be a bridesmaid in my friend Steph’s wedding next month, but because flights in Amsterdam are stupid expensive, I alas cannot take all 3 dimensions of myself to NorCal to see her tie the knot. Next best thing? Send 2 of my 3 dimensions in my place!

I definitely yoinked this idea from Matt, but if you want to yoink it, too, definitely use this site: http://www.partystandups.com/

They were a) the cheapest, b) the fastest, c) guaranteed, and d) immediately confirmed my order and got in touch with me to make sure that my cutout would arrive on time. Support good business!

Text 4
Notes All of these people claiming to have the best dad are really screwing up my research into “Best Father in the World” for the Guinness Book of World Records.

Text 118
Notes The Mind-Blowing Mount Roraima

all-thats-interesting:

Mount Roraima is the highest of the Pakaraima mountain chain in South America. The 31 square kilometer summit area is defined by 400 meter tall cliffs on all sides and includes the borders of Brazil, Venezuela, and Guyana. The tabletop mountains of the Pakaraima’s are considered some of the oldest geological formations on Earth, dating back to some two billion years ago.